I spent a few days this past week having what some would consider “taboo conversations.” And it got me to thinking about what the big “taboo” topics are that people tend to avoid – whether at work, with family, or in social situations.

Now, the “taboo conversations” I had this week revolved around sex. I will admit – I am quite a prude, but I find the fact that sex is so incredibly taboo just fascinating. I was a “late bloomer,” so to say: first kiss happening my junior year of college, first boyfriend when I was 30…Yeah…My sorority sisters in college helped to educate me by taking me to the big sex shop near campus and showing me just what everything in it was. I was horrified, to say the least. But now, I am all about sex positivity. It needs to be talked about in a healthy way, and not be so dang hidden.

Anyway, the first chat this past week was with a group of guys on how to have a conversation with a partner about their sexual preferences. I don’t mean, “Are you into guys or gals?” I’m talking about how someone likes, or doesn’t like, to be pleased in bed. The guys and I got into a long discussion on how women are different from men when it come to sex. We had a long back and forth on why women may or may be extremely adventurous, how to get over comparing current events to past (especially if both partners have been open with each other about previous sex-capades), and just how to have a sex conversation in general, even knowing it may lead to unwanted emotions coming up for both parties.

The second conversation occurred after one of the guys shared that Saturday was “National Orgasm Day.” Seriously…did you know this was a thing? It is apparently an offshoot of “International Female Orgasm Day,” coming up 8 August. Again, the group was mostly guys, and it quickly got out of hand. The gif game just got completely out of hand with this one…seeing as how we were online discussing it all. It was amazing, though, as a woman, to see how the guys’ minds immediately went to the gutter.

After doing some thinking about these two chats, I put the question out to a group of my friends: “What do you think the top “Taboo Conversation Topics” are?” and I got the following replies: Politics, Religion, Death, Sex, Income, Mental Illness…to name a few. And, as I expect with this group, we started talking about why some things are “taboo” or have a social stigma attached, and how discussing taboo subjects is taboo. Why are some taboo topics so dang controversial, and is something taboo because it is controversial and vice versa? Why is something considered taboo here in the US an everyday norm elsewhere in the world?

I guess, where I’m going with this, is…how can we get over the social taboo of discussing taboo topics? I mean, I don’t expect it to become polite conversation to talk about a donkey show over the Thanksgiving dinner table (if your family is into that, by all means, please have that talk, I don’t judge), but parents teaching their children how to have these more…intimate…conversations that can get quite awkward is a huge step in the right direction. And if you are perfectly fine with it, go ahead and start the conversation with those who may not be as open as you. No judging if someone is not ready to go there yet, but be ready and willing to talk when they are.