Simplicity, it seems like this is not the time of year to talk about simplicity, what with so many holidays, multiple gatherings, and a multitude of Christmas presents being exchanged. Me, I prefer to keep things simple and traditional, and this includes gift giving. When it comes to giving gifts, I prefer to select a gift that has meaning for the recipient; I don’t buy something just to have a gift to give. I also don’t buy a gift hoping that it creates an amazingly huge reaction from the person receiving it; I just buy something small and meaningful if I find something that inspires me to do so.

Unfortunately, this is not how most people treat gift-giving. Growing up, there were always a ton of gifts beneath the tree and for birthdays, and I can remember often coming away unfulfilled, annoyed at what I got, feeling that the givers “didn’t get” or “didn’t understand” me. See, this is what happens when you buy gifts just to have something to give; you alienate the person you are getting the gifts for. I have been mortified as well; when I bring something small and then receive a large host of gifts. It’s quite embarassing, really, and makes me extremely uncomfortable.

My MIL is one of these generous gift-givers, and I learned this the first Christmas I spent with Squatch’s family. I found out that she liked glass ornaments, and so I found a gorgeous 4-ornament set at the Christkindlmarkt in Chicago. I wrapped the box carefully, using butcher paper and coloured ribbon for some decoration, and made sure it was packed safely for the 6-hour drive to her house. What I was not prepared for was the never-ending stream of gifts that came out from under the tree for everyone. The poor man’s car was packed to the roof as we drove back home, and I was questioning what I had gotten myself into. See, there were so many gifts, and because we didn’t really know each other yet, they were all meaningless to me. There were blankets, socks, pajamas, scarves, a purse, an Irish Santa Clause figurine, etc. The pit in my stomach just got deeper and deeper as I opened each package, and the expectant look on my future MIL’s face as she searched to see the joy and excitement she expected to see on my face was just too much. I did not want to watch when she opened the one package from me; knowing that she had completely overspent on me compared to what I had gotten her.

I feigned pleasure with each successive item, but I felt dead inside. I started wondering why gift giving is such a big deal to some people, and started recalling my childhood. Yes, there were always a ton of gifts, and when I really think about it, the few that I greatly recall are the books I got. See, I’m a complete and utter bookworm. I LOVE books, especially old books, and I always had a list of favourite authors and new releases that I wanted to get my hands on. Occasionally I would get a book that I already had, but that was ok, I could return it and then peruse the book shelves until I found something I wanted. But, the rest of the gifts, they were not what I wanted. The clothes never fit right, or were not the right style, the toys, meh, I could care less about the toys. There was never anything personal, so eventually I just started asking for gift cards to the stores I liked. I could then just pick out what I wanted or needed, and it would not be so awkward for me to open everything.

Fast forward to my bridal shower, and my MIL again overdid it. It seemed like every other present was from her, and I saw the looks passed between some of the guests as they heard me say her name over and over. When I made my registry for Little Man, Squatch and I agreed to keep it simple, and did a very minimal list. What my MIL didn’t realize is that we could see who was buying the different items. Because she wanted us to get everything on the list, she was constantly checking it and picking up different items. I had to add things to the list, because she had bought so much, and my mother had mentioned that there was not much on the list; I had to add three separate times. After the second time, we told her to stop buying stuff, and she was shocked that we knew what she was doing.

So, Squatch and I had agreed that we do not want to do Christmas or birthday gifts for Little Man. We shared this news with our families, and braced ourselves for the inevitable. My family at least asked if there was anything specific we wanted or needed for Little Man’s first Christmas and birthday, so I sent them to my Amazon list; they were great and followed the recommendations. Squatch’s side; yeah, they didn’t care. They all just bought a ton of, let’s face it, shit that we neither needed or wanted. I am so thankful for gift receipts, because we returned almost everything Little Man got last year, and have the gift receipts set aside for whatever we may need to get him in the future. There were a few things we did not get gift receipts for, and those were either donated, sold on FaceBook, or re-gifted to other family members.

This Christmas, we again said we did not want any gifts, but if anyone was so inclined to buy something, we had an Amazon list for Little Man and one for Squatch and myself. Yes, my MIL has gone and bought a ton of crap for Little Man (I wrapped all the gifts last week because I’m quick and I’m damn good at wrapping presents); toys, toys, and more toys. I told her that the joke is on her, because we are living with her and my FIL, and her house will be full of all the toys. We did get a few gift cards, which we absolutely appreciate, and they have been thrown into the envelope with the rest for when we do need them. And, we have had a few people buy gifts off the Amazon lists, so we are pleased that the plan somewhat worked.

Now, when it comes to simplicity, this is the best we can expect for right now. Yes, we have expressed our preference to not give any gifts, or if someone does want to get us a gift, get us an experience gift; I specifically told my MIL we would like a family pass to the local children’s museum, because it gets us in there, a local wildlife park, and another museum. I’ll let you know if that one appears under the tree, but my money is on it not being there. However, for Little Man and all the toys, we are going back to our old toy rotation.

Currently, the toys and books are split up: half are upstairs (quiet toys only!) and half are downstairs. We are going to pull his older toys out, box them up, and put them in the closet, to make way for two or three of the new ones. Little Man can play with those for a month, and then we will start rotating toys in and out. Being 19 months old, he does have a great attention span; he will be entertained with a toy for 5-10 minutes right now. I say this is because of the toy rotation we have been doing since he was a newborn. I actually read an article the other day, which I’ve shared on FaceBook and MeWe, on how fewer toys makes kids more intelligent and creative. I see it in Little Man, and I don’t want it to change.

He does not have any favourite toys, but he does have a favourite book, “Llama, Llama, Red Pajama,” which he has me read to him at least 5 times a day. And let me tell you, he LOVES his books. We will sit for 20 minutes or so and read all of his upstairs books a few times over, and he does the same in the basement. Being readers, Squatch and I could not be more pleased, even if we have the books all memorized and are sick and tired of some of them. We are starting to hide some books as well, and are starting a book rotation to go along with the toy rotation.

How do you keep things simple at the holidays? What about your kids and their toys? Is your playroom overrun with toys (as most tend to be nowadays), or is it neat and orderly with just a few toys available? My secret: wooden crates for everything. Toys and books are kept in wooden crates, and if they don’t fit, they are set aside for a future rotation. With Christmas, I’m actually going to pick up a new crate to keep everything neat and organized in the closet.